Dear Papa,
20 years has gone by since God called you home on April 12, 2001. He must have needed you more than I did, which is incredibly hard for me to understand sometimes. In the blink of an eye, my Papa, the man who wished my name into existence, loved me unconditionally and always provided a safe space for me when the world got scary or when life got tough, was gone. Coping well with your passing was not in the cards for me...I struggled hard for a long time to move on without you, so much so in fact that for over a year I couldn’t even discuss it or provide comfort to other family members who missed you too. I was only 22 years old when you passed and my life was in such an uncertain place. I still needed you. I still need you today. Sometimes I wish desperately that I could run to your place to escape life a little, get one of your big, tight hugs and hear your one-of-a-kind voice tell me it’ll be okay or even get a dose of tough love that you weren’t shy to dole out if I needed to hear it. But, there will be no safe space to run to, no hug, no loving talks. There will only be my one-sided conversations looking up to heaven hoping you hear me, feel my love, and know how much I miss you, and that’s all there will be until I get to be with you again. A hole was left in my heart and my life the day you died, and it will always be there because I loved you so much. You can’t heal a loss like that. Nobody loved me like you, nobody ever will. I’ll love you and miss you all of my days. xoxo
Until we meet again,
Your Granddaughter,
Rebecca-Lynn Roy (nee Martel)
(a.k.a. your Becca-Lune)
